Tangled Webs

I had no idea when I started this blog how much of our personal life I would be sharing on it.  I figured I'd post a few pictures and share a story or two and that would be it.  The nice thing about writing so much is that we have a great record of our journey and it has enabled us to still feel close to everyone at home.  On the flip side, anytime we do something that doesn't turn out so well, I have to tell about that, too.  Oh well, c'est la vie!

At three o'clock in the morning I was lying in bed wide awake, unable to get back to sleep after Ryan was up to pee.  Tim could sleep either so I asked him what he was thinking about that was keeping him awake and he wasn't sure.  I knew exactly what my problem was.  Nicholas and school.  We started talking about it and what happened yesterday while we were there picking up Nick.  I didn't mention it all last night, just the part about the teacher wanting us to leave, and I won't go into a lot of detail now.  The gist of it is that there was some lying going on which I got dragged into.  One thing I have stressed to both my kids is that lying is unacceptable and I have very little tolerance for it.  We don't lie to them and we expect that they won't lie to us.  The really bad thing was the reason for the lying.  It was simply because I wanted to pick Nicholas up early so that he could spend more time with his Nanny, something that the Chinese kindergarten apparently doesn't understand.  In my opinion, if I want to take my child out of school for any reason, I should not have to lie about it.  This lie, coupled with the fact that Nick is miserable there (most likely since he can't talk to any of his classmates) kept me awake for quite a while.  I heard Mom up so I went out to the living room and we sat and chatted about it for a while.  When I came back to bed, Tim was still awake and we talked a little more and decided right then to take Nick out of the school.  I got back up and told Mom that if she was up in the morning when he got up, she could tell him that he didn't have to go to school today.  I would explain to him later that he wouldn't be going back at all.

When I woke up this morning I called Nicholas into my room and asked him about the day before and the lie that someone told.  His response: "She should know better".  I went on to tell him that his dad and I don't feel that sending him to a place like that, where it's okay to lie, is a good thing for him.  I told him that he wouldn't be going back again, ever.  I kind of expected him to be excited but I think it was more relief than anything.  I know I was relieved.  It seemed so wrong to be taking him to a place where children are called by number instead of name and where they try to get rid of someone because they are making the children laugh.  I also got a very strange vibe from his head teacher, almost like she might start crying at any time.  She seemed sad.  I had said to Tim last week that I hoped going there wouldn't break his spirit.  Red flag, Jan!  When I was lying in bed, unable to sleep, I was sort of hoping that when I told the school we would be gone for two months in the winter that perhaps they would tell us we were not welcome to come back.  Isn't that silly?  I am an adult, a mother, and didn't want to make the decision myself to take my child out of that school.  I guess some of it is that I wanted to believe that he would adjust but also that I didn't want to come on this blog and explain that we were 'quitting' school.  But, for the good of my four-year-old, I came to my senses and realized (with a little help from my mom) that it just doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.  We tried, it didn't work, and that's the end of it.  Of course, I know that people who matter most to us will support our decision anyway because they trust our judgement when it comes to our kids.

Once I told Nicholas the good news we all relaxed a little bit and started planning our day.  Nanny took the boys out for a walk and a picnic while I had my Chinese lesson.  Afterward I tried to get Ryan to have a nap but he was pretty wound up.  I managed to get him into bed but he wanted Nanny to lie down with him.  She did and a little while later I heard giggling.  I went into the room to find Nanny with Ryan's socks on her hands, doing a little puppet show for him.  Since he wasn't going to sleep I suggested we go to Happy City.  Everyone agreed and after we fixed the wheel on the wagon we dragged the boys up to Carrefour.  They were incredibly excited to show Nanny their indoor playground.  We had a fantastic time and have the pictures to prove it.

After Happy City we came back so Nanny could have a massage with Lena.  She too enjoyed it immensely and will likely have a couple per week for the whole time she is here.  It is heavenly!

Tonight after supper the boys went to bed early and Mom and I went for a walk in the park.  It was the first time I have been able to get there in the evening and it was beautiful.  The lights are gorgeous and you would never know you are in the middle of a city with eight million people in it.  On the way back the ladies who do the dancing and tai chi demonstrations were practicing in front of our building so we sat and watched for about a half hour.  It was so relaxing.

So that's about it for now.  I am really tired and just want to have a snack and go to bed.  Tomorrow will likely be a busy day so I need to be rested.  Mom asked me to tell everyone back home, "Hello!".  Have a great day everyone!